are you so shy because you have an std?
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
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