oh god the rape fog is back!
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
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