This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize
