So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
My tweets this weekend consisted of me telling every bar I went to that they were my favorite valentine. I've never felt like more of an alcoholic
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
