There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize
