so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Randomize
