THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
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