just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
as a side note pls kill me
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
Randomize
