flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
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