Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
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