Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
Randomize
