Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
Come on in and take your pants off
Randomize
