I need a sticker that says "It's no use hitting on me - I'm the plus one" Seriously, how do they think I got in in the 1st place?
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
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