awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
He called me "the Joe Montana of blowies." Not sure if that is an accomplishment or an insult, but going off of the amount of condensation on the windows of my car, I'm gonna just do a little touchdown dance and pass out.
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon�
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
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