I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
All I want is dick and wine.
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
Randomize
