So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. �Hello 29...
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Randomize
