just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
Randomize
