he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
Randomize
