you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
Last time i carry you out of a forest
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
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