Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
to be fair i didnt know she wanted to sleep with me
WHY THE FUCK ELSE WOULD SHE DRAG A STRAIGT MAN INTO A VICTORIA'S SECRET CHANGEROOM GODDAMMIT
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