I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
Randomize
