no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
Randomize
