You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
