So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
Randomize
