she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
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