They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
I hear youre working today. To keep you entertained, ive compiled a list of condiments that my dick has NOT been slathered in since last Friday: Relish, and raspberry jam. That's right.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
I just got a nosebleed on a date at the cheesecake factory...
just run out of the bathroom with blood gushing down your face and scream "ITS IN THE CHEESECAKE!!!!!"
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
Randomize
