I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
If I brought two seashells to Lowe's, do you think that they'd drill two holes in each shell for me? I need to be a mermaid on Saturday...
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
Randomize
