Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
Randomize
