someone get that fucking seahorse.
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
