I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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