We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
Randomize
