i was rollin on her like bob the builder
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
My night just got really weird. In a sit down stall bathroom at this nice resturaunt and this guy walks in as I rip a humongous porcelain-splitting fart. Well, I hear him stop for a second. He then opens the door to the stall next to mine, sits down and says, "player two has entered the game."
Did you win?
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
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