I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
You left your phone here
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