I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
Randomize