I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
Can vaginas get frostbite?
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
Randomize
