yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
I woke up to you in just boxers at my door at 7a.m. with you saying how many squrriels you counted on the walk back, then you made me penis shaped pancakes
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
Randomize
