So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
Randomize
