ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize