You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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