what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
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