we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
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