Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Randomize
