walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
I just forgot I was standing up.
Can't talk, ducks in the car
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
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