Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
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