I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
Randomize
