I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
Hey, scratch that. I've shit 8 times today. I don't have the energy to get laid so I cancelled my date.
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Randomize
