We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
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