Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
smell my finger.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
Randomize
