My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Randomize
