do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
Listen, dont tell me about your day or that your mom is in town. Don't ask me to drive you to the airport or proofread your paper. Text me when and only when you have a boner. Oh and take your pants off and leave your front door unlocked because I'm coming over.
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
Randomize
